The Grand Finale.

ermahgerd hernserns mahtherdIn the spirit of Finishing What I Started, I will wrap up this series, Hansons Marthon Method Training with Your Pal Colby, with one final weekly recap. It just wouldn’t be complete. I couldn’t skip Week 18, lovingly referred to as My Shit Micro-Taper Week which ended, of course with The Baystate Marathon. In case you nodded off, Week 18 also included a double eye infection, Drunk Otis’ million dollar emergency sock extraction surgery (and subsequent satellite dish of a cone) and the usual phantom taper aches and pains. Between Tina and I, we had plantar fasciitis, piriformis syndrome and a broken hip. Total Insanity. I blame Hansons.

So without further ado, here’s how Week 18 went down.  Hold on to your butts, Poodles. IT’S COMING!werk it

Monday: Easy 6 Miles. I had an early morning panic attack wondering if my legs would actually recover this week and feel fresh come Sunday. I had beaten them into submission for 18 Weeks and almost thought they would revolt and hitchhike right outta Dodge. Instead, they were compliant. And giddy.

Tuesday: Easy 5 miles. For the first time in months, I did NOT run intervals at Half Past Ass O’clock. Instead I slept in and drank coffee in bed in the morning. Is that what normal people do? My legs sent me a cookie bouquet in gratitude.

Wednesday:  RESTFUCKINGDAY!  I obsessed about what I was wearing on Sunday since the weather had turned from chilly to frost warning. However, my wardrobe issues quickly dissipated when Drunk Otis and his sock-blocked intestines wound up at the vet having emergency surgery. Because that’s the kind of crisis you need during your taper. Or any day. Dumb Brown Dog.

Thursday: Tempo Run? What Tempo Run? NONE! And Thank You Sweet, Tired Baby Jesus. Because between my still sore eyes and The Sock Guy, 6 easy miles was about all could handle. In light of all this nonsense, I wondered if the taper would even work.

Friday: 6 easy miles. Dare I say I started to feel rested?!?!? And felt like I had oodles of extra time! I didn’t know what to do with myself, so I went and got a brow wax. #priorities Then went to the eye doctor. Then picked up Drunk Otis and His Massive Cone. I also poured myself a drink and remembered Tina was picking me up in the morning. You know, to finally run the marathon I had been living, eating and breathing for 18 stinking weeks? Honestly, it didn’t even seem real. Primarily because I felt as if I couldn’t run to the mailbox if I tried. Even a micro-taper screws with your body-mind connection.

Saturday: 3 miles. THREE MILES. I hadn’t run “just” 3 miles in an eternity. HOLY TOLEDO. IT’S FINALLY HERE. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Instead of being nervous, I got excited. Really. Freaking. Excited.

Sunday: 26.2 miles. The Grand Finale. All that work. All that doubt. All those miles. And?

I did it!

I did it!



I can’t even. I’m sitting here with tears rolling down my cheeks. I am totally overwhelmed. I did it!  I really did it. BQ and PR. I had the run of my life. OF MY LIFE! Expect a real recap once I compose myself. Today I was alternating between spontaneously fist pumping to bursting into tears every 25 minutes or so. GET IT TOGETHER, COLBY. After all, you’re runnin’ Boston. πŸ˜‰

Total number of miles: 52

Total number of times I said: I JUST FUCKING QUALIFIED FOR BOSTON!  1,648

Number of hours spent smiling the biggest, toothiest, happiest smile of my life since yesterday: 24



73 thoughts on “The Grand Finale.

  1. Super happy for you! I’ve been following your training and through all the tough runs with little recovery and mishaps with Drunk Otis and his satellite sized cone accessory, you ran that Bitch! It’s time to party!!

  2. SO FUCKING HAPPY FOR YOU. You earned it. Straight up earned it. You worked your tail off, made Drunk Otis eat a sock… You did it. And it was all you. I can’t wait to hear more!
    My question is: do you think you could have gotten there with another method or was it the volume that did it for you?

  3. YOU FUCKING QUALIFIED FOR BOSTON COLBY!!!!!! Wow! Massive mad props! Coming from a chronic slow run sufferer, that is outta this world impressive! I ran the Columbus Mararhon on Sunday and followed a girl for at least 20 miles who’s shirt said “It seems impossible until it’s DONE” It was her first marathon. And I had the pleasure of running the first 8 miles with a fantastic human being by the name of Tim. He was running his 46th full marathon WITH A PROSTHETIC LEG!!! What an inspiration!!! And, I suppose I oughta mention, I finally got my sub 5-hour marathon PR! Might seem pathetic to most but I’m pretty damn happy about it and that’s all that matters! Thank you for all the laughs and inspiration this summer/fall. Congrats on your amazing BQ victory! I’ll do a victory dance for you as soon as my tree stumps for legs will allow me to move without whimpering LOL! Cheers!
    (And I’m glad Drunk Otis is ok!)

    • CONGRATULATIONS!!!! Man, you had an emotional marathon! That’s fantastic! And thank you for your kind words. I am stunned. I mean it. I never thought it would happen. Until I decided to truly work for it. Who woulda thought?!! Congrats again, Toni!!!

  4. AHHHHHHHHHH OHHHHH EEMMMMMM GEEEEEEEEE AHHHHHHHHHH! I knew about the BQ from instagram but now I can finally say CONGRATULATIONS!!! YES!!!! YESSSS!!! YESSSSS! This means you will run BOSTON 2017 and I also just qualified so JUST MAYBE WE CAN MEET. Is it bad that I am not only excited for your amazing race and BQ, but for me too?! Haha. OMG I CAN’T WAIT FOR THE RECAP. I am dying over here.

  5. Just epic. I never doubted you would do it, and yet seeing you cross that finish line with a BQ was so freaking emotional (as everyone in the Greater Lowell Area will attest). Well done, my dear friend! Well done!

  6. BOOOOOM! So happy and proud of you!!!!!!! You are ermagahd ermazing!!! Can’t wait till we’re in the same city and can share some beerskies!!!! Helly and I spoke of you in Chicago. You funny lady. Maybe come to New Orleans in Feb for the RNR half/full??????

  7. That’s amazing! Congrats on the BQ and the great race! I’ve been reading your Hanson’s saga and lurking (and giggling at your hilarious updates) – so awesome to see how the method and all the hard work you put into it paid off for you. Congratulations!

    • I’m a believer!!! I mean it!!! It’s overwhelming. And you will be running your face off. But if you stick to the plan and paces as best you can (barring major natural and physical disasters) you will shave time off of your marathon. No. Doubt. You will PR. I’m proof! Can’t wait to see what you think!!!!

  8. Pingback: Acceptance.Β  – It's A Marathon AND A Sprint

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