The Sunday Night Existential Crisis


Damn you, Weekend. Where have you gone? And for the love of all things Sunday, why do I get an insta-stomach ache when it gets to like, 8pm and I get the I DON’T WANNA GO TO WORK 3rd grade hissy fit going? It’s usually followed by a super dramatic stomp to the laundry room only to realize that I haven’t thrown my favorite running duds in the washer and what’s in the washer smells like dirty moldy feet because it’s been there since Friday, soaking wet.

WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?!?!

*throws self on hardwood floor, clutches knees, and yells WHHHHHYYYYY a la Nancy Kerrigan circa 1994 clubbing*

Hello, Sunday Night Existential Crisis! It’s that moment each and every damn week where I question the very foundations of my existence. We’re talking frenzy, Poodles. What does it all mean? What’s the point of all this? When I am long gone, will I have left a teeny tiny mark, ON ANYTHING? Oh, yeah. We’re talkin’ DEFCON level 10 drama.

This shit more often than not follows a great weekend that I don’t want to end. This time it was a quiet weekend with My Other Half and the pups, running, hiking, exploring and relaxing together in Vermont. Nothing mega fab. Just quiet. No TV. No WIFI. Just books, beer, blankets and each other. Simple. Paired down. Together. I love weekends like that. I usually come home and rant about downsizing, camper van adventures, tiny homes and living off the grid.

These kind of weekends really do make me question my life choices. From lifestyle to work to what goals I am setting to what race I’m running to why aren’t i doing yoga to…..EVERYTHING. And then I stomp around like Grouchy Smurf instead of actually doing something. Totally crippled by my own ridiculous inertia. Such a brat.

So. Now that I’ve called myself out on my petulant self, here’s what I just did.

  1. Registered for the Vermont City Marathon
  2. Bought an unlimited month of yoga
  3. Re-Washed my damn running clothes

Boom. DONE. There. Take THAT Existential Crisis. NOW I have a plan. Because if I can bitch and sulk and stomp around yelling GAAAAAHHHH all Sunday night, I can damn well sit my ass down, be grateful for a lovely weekend, be thankful to have been surrounded with all that I love and decide what the fuck I am running this spring, sign up for a yoga class tomorrow and do my damn laundry.

Enough. GET IT TOGETHER, COLBY.

I feel better already. โ˜บ๏ธ

Do you have an occasional Existential Crisis? Or are they just reserved for major life changes? What are you doing with your life? ๐Ÿ˜œ

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10 thoughts on “The Sunday Night Existential Crisis

  1. Oh, man, I identify with this SO HARD. Sunday nights are the worst. I love my colleagues, but my job itself sucks the life out of me. Add to that the darkness and being lazy about workouts and the stress of trying to buy a house and I just want to run screaming from everything. I’m glad you were able to pull your sh*t together. Hopefully I can do the same…

    • I have great faith in you! Seriously though. All of us would rather be doing 4,000 other things. None of which is work. In order to make it all more tolerable we definitely need to make space for the other stuff- stuff that thrills us. xoxo

  2. I hate Sunday nights, too! After spending a long weekend visiting New England colleges (including UVM in Burlington) with my younger daughter, and having the same hissy fit last night myself (including not having the running clothes l wanted this morning after being away!!!), I completely understand!

    FWIW, my daughter thinks your list is awesome. She thinks I should sign up just so she can get another visit to Burlington in the spring … when Burlington is PERFECT!

    Thanks so much for this post!

    • I ADORE Burlington!! And Vermont City Marathon is truly fantastic. Run it! My other half and I will meet you for a celebratory beer afterwards. With all of the delicious IPAs at your very fingertips, Burlington is truly a delight. I shared in your angst last night. However it did subside once I got my shit together. Happy Monday, Paul! And best of luck to your daughter!!!

  3. Heya great post and u totally pulled it together. Have u read any Marcus Aurelius, he helped me a lot with my existential crises! I’m abit injured at the mo so can’t work, can’t believe I’m saying this but really miss it!

    • I haven’t!! But you can bet I will now! I totally can believe you! Sometimes a set back puts things into perspective a bit. And rest is really active recovery, right? ๐Ÿ˜‰ Heal swiftly, Friend. And thanks for the recommendation!

  4. Pingback: I’m all about that base, ’bout that base… | It's A Marathon AND A Sprint

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